You all have been waiting for that annual good laugh.
Here it is. 2006 Darwin Awards
Browsing Posts published in December, 2006
HD-DVD and Blu-Ray AACS DRM Cracked:
EGSonikku writes “According to this article on Endgadget, the AACS DRM used in HD-DVD and Blu-Ray has been cracked. The program allows one to decrypt and dump the video for play on a users hard drive, or it can be burned to a blank HD-DVD and played on a stand-alone player. According to the accompanying video, a source release for the program will be made available in January. Time to get that $200 Xbox 360 HD-DVD drive?” Warning: this link contains video.
The Numbers Stations Analyzed, Discussed
:
GMontag wrote to mention a Washington Post article about the always-intriguing ‘number’ radio broadcasts. The numbers stations, as they are known, are ‘hiding in plain sight’ spycraft. Random digits broadcast at little-used frequencies are known to be intelligence agencies broadcasting their secrets in encrypted form. The Post article gives a nice run-down on the truth behind the transmissions, and touches a bit on the odd community that has grown fascinated by them. From the article: “On 6840 kHz, you may hear a voice reading groups of letters. That’s a station nicknamed ‘E10,’ thought to be Israel’s Mossad intelligence. Chris Smolinski runs SpyNumbers.com and the ‘Spooks’ e-mail list, where ‘number stations’ hobbyists log hundreds of shortwave messages transmitted every month. ‘It’s like a puzzle. They’re mystery stations,’ explained Smolinski, who has tracked the spy broadcasts for 30 years.” This article made me recall a great All Things Considered story from a few years back about Akin Fernandez’s ‘Numbers’ CD, a CD compilation of some of the most interesting strings of randomly read numbers reaching out across the airwaves.
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
1. She is not a “BABE” or a “CHICK” – She is a “BREASTED AMERICAN.”
2. She is not a “SCREAMER” or a “MOANER” – She is “VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.”
3. She is not “EASY” – She is “HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.”
4. She is not a “DUMB BLONDE” – She is a “LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.”
5. She has not “BEEN AROUND” – She is a “PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION.”
6. She is not an “AIRHEAD” – She is “REALITY IMPAIRED.”
7. She does not get “DRUNK” or “TIPSY” – She gets “CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED”
8. She does not have “BREAST IMPLANTS” – She is “MEDICALLY ENHANCED.”
9. She does not “NAG” you – She becomes “VERBALLY REPETITIVE.”
10. She is not a “TRAMP” – She is “SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.”
11. She does not have “MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS” – She is “PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.”
12. She is not a “TWO-BIT HOOKER” – She is a “LOW COST PROVIDER.”
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
1. He does not have a “BEER GUT” – He has developed a “LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.”
2. He is not a “BAD DANCER” – He is “OVERLY CAUCASIAN.”
3. He does not “GET LOST ALL THE TIME” – He “INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.”
4. He is not “BALDING” – He is in “FOLLICLE REGRESSION.”
5. He is not a “CRADLE ROBBER” – He prefers “GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS.”
6. He does not get “FALLING-DOWN DRUNK” – He becomes “ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.”
7. He does not act like a “TOTAL ASS” – He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.“
8. He is not a ”MALE CHAUVINIST PIG“ – He has ”SWINE EMPATHY.“
9. He is not afraid of ”COMMITMENT“ – He is ”RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGED.“
10. He is not ”HORNY“ – He is ”SEXUALLY FOCUSED.“
11. It’s not his ”CRACK“ you see hanging out of his pants – It’s ”REAR CLEAVAGE
-Network Attack, Attributed to China, Disables Naval War College
(30 November 2006)
US Navy officials reported that the Naval War College computers were taken off line because of intrusions suspected of being carried out by
Chinese hackers. The school trains senior military officers in tactics and runs war games. Computers are being investigated to determine the
extent of the intrusion.
http://washingtontimes.com/national/20061130-103049-5042r.htm
